I had a wonderful day today, even though part of it was spent telling my group why I was a waste of space and should kill myself. Hmmm. Anyway, the rest of the day went really well. Big confession time here, this is something I keep so compartmentalized from myself that it never even occured to me to put in writing: I was arrested last year for shoplifting. I wasn't booked or fingerprinted or anything, but I was handcuffed within the store, then given a ticket/paper that told me to show up for court. I got a lawyer, paid him mucho bucks, and he's been on it since then. Today was our trial date, finally, after lawyer stalled for a year on purpose. His strategy was to continue the case forever, so that when it finally came to trial, none of the witnesses/cops would show up. AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED? IT WORKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I went to the courthouse today for the trial, and before it even got started the prosecution dropped my case because no cops showed up to witness!!!! Yay!!!! YAY.
This is a second chance for me. It's like the Goddess said, hey chica, wake up! when I got arrested, but she let me off the hook for major damage. Now I can pay more money and have my record expunged, and I will be as pure as the driven snow. Ha. But I must work on the shoplifting. I now have pretty much accepted that it is part of my whole trauma-liciousness. It actually is on a list in the book Secret Survivors. Checklist to see if you have sexual trauma, and shoplifting is one of the choices. That was quite a shock when I saw that, because it doesn't immediately seem to have to do with trauma. But there's a correlation. Weird.
Lara came back to group today to process more about her leaving. I missed most of it because of court, but it was nice she came. I am going to miss her so, so, so, so, so, so much. Sad just thinking about it.
OK. Good day! I went to walk on the beach to celebrate my courthouse victory and it was nice. I picked up a cool piece of coral I want to make into a necklace.
I am still sort of in love with -. In love is probably not the write word. In infatuation? In like? I want to spend more time with her, and I can't because she's such a damn loner. I miss her when I'm not hanging out with her, and we're just friends. Ugh. I don't know if this is romantic, or I'm just lonely and excited to have a friend who can keep up with me. I don't think I really want to do anything physical with her, I just want to be around her a lot. What is that? A friend crush?
OK, time to finish my dang business cards. I've been working on them for weeks, and I've got to take the plunge, finalize the design and order the damn things! They will be ordered by tomorrow. Yay. Then the official Owl Tutoring will begin. If I get 4 clients a week I would be overjoyed. And I'm pretty sure I can get them! Yay!
So I went to the courthouse today for the trial, and before it even got started the prosecution dropped my case because no cops showed up to witness!!!! Yay!!!! YAY.
This is a second chance for me. It's like the Goddess said, hey chica, wake up! when I got arrested, but she let me off the hook for major damage. Now I can pay more money and have my record expunged, and I will be as pure as the driven snow. Ha. But I must work on the shoplifting. I now have pretty much accepted that it is part of my whole trauma-liciousness. It actually is on a list in the book Secret Survivors. Checklist to see if you have sexual trauma, and shoplifting is one of the choices. That was quite a shock when I saw that, because it doesn't immediately seem to have to do with trauma. But there's a correlation. Weird.
Lara came back to group today to process more about her leaving. I missed most of it because of court, but it was nice she came. I am going to miss her so, so, so, so, so, so much. Sad just thinking about it.
OK. Good day! I went to walk on the beach to celebrate my courthouse victory and it was nice. I picked up a cool piece of coral I want to make into a necklace.
I am still sort of in love with -. In love is probably not the write word. In infatuation? In like? I want to spend more time with her, and I can't because she's such a damn loner. I miss her when I'm not hanging out with her, and we're just friends. Ugh. I don't know if this is romantic, or I'm just lonely and excited to have a friend who can keep up with me. I don't think I really want to do anything physical with her, I just want to be around her a lot. What is that? A friend crush?
OK, time to finish my dang business cards. I've been working on them for weeks, and I've got to take the plunge, finalize the design and order the damn things! They will be ordered by tomorrow. Yay. Then the official Owl Tutoring will begin. If I get 4 clients a week I would be overjoyed. And I'm pretty sure I can get them! Yay!
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